The first thing I notice is that you’re not returning the new $args.
You probably also need to add the ‘meta_key’ to search
function my_relationship_query_add_slug( $args, $field, $object ) {
//gets the slug
$slug = get_field('_slug', $object->ID);
// add meta_key to WP_Query
$args['meta_key'] = 'meta_key to search for _slug in';
//add slug to WP_Query
$args['meta_value'] = $slug;
// return new $args
return $args;
}
add_filter('acf/fields/relationship/query', 'my_relationship_query_add_slug', 10, 3);